Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
