i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
