We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
