I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
