You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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