All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
