O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize