glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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