Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
