he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
We had to coat check the pizza.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize