She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
