I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
