Can Purell be used as lube?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
