That's intense
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Randomize
