WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
