he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Randomize
