so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
it was like eating out sand paper
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
