im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
