just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize