I'm laying in your front yard are you home
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
