before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
