he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
