Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
