Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
