im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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