I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
