be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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