Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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