You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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