not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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