Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
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