ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I came so hard my ears popped.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize