Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
she smelled like a LAN party
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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