And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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