i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
He kissed a someone with a penis
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
