using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I need a beard to bite.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
