You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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