We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
