are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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