Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
