there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
