my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
