come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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