I want to stick my p in your. b.
"it" just moved
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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