Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Randomize
