Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
