no. you can't hotbox the world.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
