i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
