i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize