in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
where does the pee come out of this thing
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
