Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
