I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
she pinky promised me she was 18
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
